Psychic Rending

I have found myself, and my place of peace. This latest departure has left little impact on me. I am who I am, and I have always known that I am immutable and unchanging. It is both gift and curse, and those who try (and fail) to change me are unworthy of carrying my crest upon their breast, until they realise that I am to be accepted, flaws and all. I have my boys with me, and MC was really sweet. I just didn't feel like talking, so I'm sorry. I have much to do, and little time to spare for those who have already left. So it is with some relief that I bid goodbye to the departed, and say hello to new beginnings and unexpected freedom. I tried to salvage whatever I could from the wreckage, but I'm tired of always compromising and not being understood. I will not stand by and allow my philosophies to be mocked. I am a free spirit, not one to be tied down by schedules and obligations. It is a bitter truth that I am an intellectual snob, and most people cannot hold their own in a conversation with me. For 3 years, I was constantly changing. This time I will stand my ground and say, enough is enough. If you cannot accept me because I need some time alone with my thoughts, if I have to choose between my thoughts, who I am, and someone who cannot understand me, is constantly trying to change me, then my choice is clear. Until you learn to accept me and my philosophical needs, I cannot waste time pandering to your social needs, as I have done for the past 3 years. It hurt to know that I had been deleted, but as the night progressed and my thoughts evened out, I realised...it's better this way. I need someone more intelligent, someone who's capable of understanding what I need, someone who can debate with me and help me understand these things I never talk about to lesser people. I deserve better, and I have been a lot happier talking to MC, FD and my two Js about my philosophies and getting logical responses. I wouldn't say I haven't been stressed at work, because work is always stressful, but I have been happy. I have found my footing. I have found people who understand me, I have found people who like me for who I am. I'm free. I'll pay off my debts, and look forward to December, when I will be moving overseas to continue my education. I have been trying to decide between music and philosophy, and I still can't decide which I prefer. It was a helluva rollercoaster ride, these three years, and I'm really tired of always being the one that's compromising, and apologising, and mending broken bridges. This time, I really don't give a flying fuck. MC's gonna drag me off to Suntec next weekend, and I'm gonna drag him off to the movies after we're done. JJ! I wanna go for Janice's wedding next Friday. =) I need to wish Jason good luck. :P To quote my favourite childhood story, what's done is done and cannot be done. Tonight really highlighted the fact that you don't understand me at all. And I regret that these 3 years can be considered wasted. Well, we learn from our mistakes and move on. I still have my music, my thoughts and theories, my constructs, and my friends. =)
Never, ever mock my philosophies. If you can't understand the concept, maintain your standing in my eyes by not saying anything at all.