Psychic Feelers
Some have already contemplated my imminent departure, and expressed regret. Again, as an INTP, I am surprised at how people value me. For unusual reasons, sure, but valid all the same. Still, my inner fire is dimming, down to embers. I must rest tonight. I've been getting fractured sleep lately, and tonight's the night where I surrender completely, just go deep into sleep, nightmares and all.
As I stood in the last pew, listening to the chiming of the bells and contemplating the passing of a life, I wondered if he knew that I was there for him. No other reason. He was standing in front of the coffin, the composure an illusion every man employs to dispel the notion of weakness. I searched his face discreetly, a shadow that blended in with the stone wall around us. His composure finally cracked, his control slipping a little, and I knew something inside him had broken forever. I shadowed the family into the viewing gallery, and closed my eyes as the sobbing broke out and washed over me, a wave of grief that I could not soothe. My eyes were on him throughout the ceremony, watching him carefully, racking my brains for something that would help to ease the pain I sensed emanating from him. I got an involuntary case of the shivers as the funereal bells tolled, but I drew comfort in the knowledge that KC was as affected by mortality as I am. He came over to thank me for coming, and I shrugged nonchalantly. I gave him my trademark lopsided grin, ignoring the fact that his eyes were red-rimmed. Now here I am, in my room, hoping good thoughts have enough impact to positively affect the people I've come to care about. I'm surprised at my own capability to empathize, but really, I shouldn't be anymore should I? I've really grown. *sighs* I'm going to watch I Think I Do before curling up in my corner to hibernate until tomorrow morning. I know the reason why I'm so down. He's flying off tonight. Wanna know what his MSN nick says? *grimaces* "Tonight is the night, bye my friend, I'll miss you. =(" *howls*
I feel, therefore I am a feeler! :P
As I stood in the last pew, listening to the chiming of the bells and contemplating the passing of a life, I wondered if he knew that I was there for him. No other reason. He was standing in front of the coffin, the composure an illusion every man employs to dispel the notion of weakness. I searched his face discreetly, a shadow that blended in with the stone wall around us. His composure finally cracked, his control slipping a little, and I knew something inside him had broken forever. I shadowed the family into the viewing gallery, and closed my eyes as the sobbing broke out and washed over me, a wave of grief that I could not soothe. My eyes were on him throughout the ceremony, watching him carefully, racking my brains for something that would help to ease the pain I sensed emanating from him. I got an involuntary case of the shivers as the funereal bells tolled, but I drew comfort in the knowledge that KC was as affected by mortality as I am. He came over to thank me for coming, and I shrugged nonchalantly. I gave him my trademark lopsided grin, ignoring the fact that his eyes were red-rimmed. Now here I am, in my room, hoping good thoughts have enough impact to positively affect the people I've come to care about. I'm surprised at my own capability to empathize, but really, I shouldn't be anymore should I? I've really grown. *sighs* I'm going to watch I Think I Do before curling up in my corner to hibernate until tomorrow morning. I know the reason why I'm so down. He's flying off tonight. Wanna know what his MSN nick says? *grimaces* "Tonight is the night, bye my friend, I'll miss you. =(" *howls*
I feel, therefore I am a feeler! :P
posted by Dark Phoenix at
5:31 PM
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