Dark Tendrils

I am in the unshakable grip of a familiar sadness. Night, that familiar mother of Darkness, cools my fevered skin with her storm winds as lightning flashes in the patch of sky I know as well as my own name. How it used to frighten me, in the days when I first came to live here, that bare unfamiliar bit of Heaven. The slightest rumble of thunder would set my heart racing in fright. My time here grows short, and I know it is time once more to unfurl my wings and take flight. Away from here, where the shadows are alien and unfriendly. That little bit of sky I can see has become my anchor, one of the many reasons why I sit in the garden swing and smoke, but it is time to set sail and leave this place. Depression dances on the fringes of my mind as I dance a slow tango with the darkness here. As much as I hate it, as much as I would prefer to live wild away from the conveniences of modern civilisation, I know deep in my heart I belong at Bedok Reservoir, where my soul is etched into every nook and cranny. Ah, Bedok...a castle full of empty halls and memories, all equally worthless to me now. And yet, I yearn once more to awaken at sunset and roam the dark streets that were mine for too long. Far, far too long for this flightless bird to remain caged. I've exchanged one cage for another, and now I want to go home. Not to my fathers, but to the only place I've ever called home. I don't belong here, as much as I try my best. I am unhappy, terribly so, and it is only on nights like these when I can admit it freely to my constant lunar companion and her attending stars. It does no good to sit here and type, not when Night beckons me so bewitchingly, and the everpresent stars twinkle merrily down at me from above, the eyes of a thousand angels, watching over the lost cause that is humanity. Drown then, drown your sorrows, my friends, drink and be happy, for we have condemned ourselves and all those around us. But we're going down happy. The winds sing in approval, and the sounds of Night here will never be forgotten. But I cannot allow the tendrils here to wrap themselves around my self and choke my soul. I am neither happy nor comfortable here, and I want to go home. To Bedok, where I discovered the true meaning of living, the compassion that sets humans apart from animals, where I found true joy in life. If that castle has closed itself off to me, then I'm setting off to live where Nature will shield my eyes from the atrocities of this world, where the winds will dance around me and where I will be free to find myself.